Heaven Haven
by karasu pit
Summary: A sorry excuse of a cute Gamzee and Tavros love story. I don't own Homestuck.
1. Chapter 1

Heaven Haven

False alarm

"I hungry," the innocent words of a little three year old girl caught the attention of Tavros, who was at the time in the kitchen preparing the evening meal for the orphans.

The young adult smiled warmly at the supposedly starving girl then gave her a gentle pat on her small head. "Don't worry Jenny bug dinner will be ready in a second." He then turned his attention back on the pot that began to boil over. "Not again!" Tavros quickly turned the dial on the old stove and removed the pot placing it in the sink. "I can't cook for nothing."

"I like your cooking!" Another little blond girl spoke up walking up to the failure of a cook.

Tavros waved the smoke that was filling the room away, "thanks Callie," he walked over to the doorway and turned the fan on. "You're way too kind."

"Mr. Tav! Mr. Tav!" A tiny freckled boy ran into the foggy room then running into the young stressed out adult. "Look! Look!" He tugged at Tav's sleeve.

"Yes, what is it now Ben?" Tav sighed knowing that the young worry wart was just giving him a false alarm…again.

"Christian pushed Sunna," Ben told hugging his caretaker's legs almost making him trip.

"That kid is going to be the death of me," Tavros said walking into the living room like area scanning the room for any signs of the bad biracial kid. He found Sunna just playing in her corner, she seemed just fine.

"Alight Christian!" Tav hollered not in the mood to hunt down the boy. "Come here!"

Tavros huffed when the horrible kid didn't show himself. "If I have to go looking for you I'm going to tell Mr. Rufio about your bad behavior!" Normally the kids would come out of hiding if Tav mentioned his stern father.

"He went in there," Ben pointed to the closed door that lead into the orphanages own little library.

"Thanks for the tip Benjamin." Tavros then proceeded to tiptoe to the book room, with the other kids right under him. He turned to the curious children then placed his index finger on his lips and gave a "shhhh…"

The kids covered their mouths as they giggled.

Tavros opened the door slowly and peeked in the dark room. His eyes immediately locked on to the familiar sight of the boys' short curly hair.

Tavros smiled then burst through the door with the kids running in the room not bothering to turn the light on. "There you are Mr. Christian!" Tav scoped the startled boy off of his feet. "Now go tell Sunna your sorry!"

They boy just threw his head back and whined kicking his legs furiously.

"Come on lets go tell Sunna sorry," Tav said carrying the heavy two year old into the living room. "And hush up all that whining. Ain't nobody got time for that!"

But when Tavros entered the room he froze in place. There was a strange man sitting on the floor with Sunna in his lap, he was playing with her short brown hair while she was brushing her dolls hair.

"Oh no…what do I do." Tav thought lowing Christian to his feet then grabbing the other kid's hands. His eyes shot to the door that lead outside then back on the laughing curly headed man.

Christian ran over to the guy but only to push Sunna once more making her hit her head on the floor. She cried loudly upon impact.

"Hey! Hey!" The man shouted grabbing the giggling boy's hands. "What the fuck man, that wasn't very nice now was it? Why the motherfuck would you all up an do that?"

Christian whined and made his body go limp. The guy let his hands go letting the boy hit the ground. He then grabbed Sunna and placed her back in his lap then continued to mess with her hair. "You ok girl?"

While he was preoccupied with Sunna Tavros grabbed a nearby wooden baseball bat that was let on the floor. He kept the kids behind him as he walked up the unsuspecting man. He raised the bat above his head about to strike.

"We mama," Sunna said looking up at Tavros reaching her arms out wanting him to pick her up.

"Huh?" The strange cat turned around and the two locked eyes. Whoa! Whoa! Wait man don't go hitting a motherfucker! He placed his arms on his head in an attempt to protect himself.

"I don't know who you are but…uh…you better leave." Tav threatened swiveling his bat a bit.

"What are you doing Tavros?" The frightened young adult dropped his bat when he heard his father's voice.

"Dad! Look we have an intruder! He's going to hurt the kids!"

"Ummm…noooooo…he's not an intruder." Rufio picked Jenny up and placed her on top of his shoulders. "Maybe I should explain what's going on before you hurt someone."

**I shall try my hardest to make this a cute and fluffy story! **


	2. Chapter 2

Heaven Haven

You're like ice

"So let me get this straight." Tavros was having a serious conversation at the kitchen table while the weird newcomer was hanging out in the living room with the kids. "That guy in there is a convicted felon who's on probation and he's here because he needs to complete at least seventy hours of community service."

"Basically yes! That's it." His father shifted uncomfortably in his chair due to his son's serious glare and his very aggravated tone.

"But isn't that I don't know, dangerous? What if he hurts one of the kid's dad?!" He banged his fists onto the table making his sissy of a father flinch and cower in pure fear.

"Don't worry he won't hurt anyone." Rufio said getting up from his seat. "He's a pretty nice guy and I highly doubt he'll get into trouble anytime soon unless he wants to be thrown back into prison." He continued to say walking off into the loud living room.

Tav sighed deeply while rubbing his temples. "Shit. I know this is not going to end well," he leaned back in his chair and closed his tired eyes for a few seconds trying to calm down. "Fuck me!"

After his little temper tantrum Tavros decided to join the others in the living room to see what all the fuss was about.

"Ow! Man! That fuckin hurts!" The stranger was laying on his stomach allowing the kids to wrestle him or play with his thick curly black hair. "Ok! Ok! You win motherfucker!" He laughed.

"Look Tavros," Rufio grabbed his sons arm and pulled him closer to the dog pile. "Does he really look that dangerous to you?"

Tavros looked up at his smiling father and glared at him until he finally let go of his arm and backed away slowly. Tavros then grabbed his set of keys that were hanging on the wall. "I'm going home, see ya later dad."

"Wait a second Tavros!" He grabbed the pissed off boy's arm once more then dragged him over to kids. "I want you to introduce yourselves real fast before you leave."

Tav gave him that nigga is you crazy look.

"Hey! Boy!" Rufio called out the guy taping his foot on his side. "Introduce yourself to my son real quick before he leaves."

"Okie doki motherfucker!" The stranger sprang to his feet and stood in front of Tav towering over him. "Sup man! The name's Gamzee Makara. He said happily with a huge friendly smile on his face. "Now you tell me your name ok?"

"Damn this guy is a fuckin giant." Tavros thought feeling rather intimidated by this eccentric fellow. "Ummm…I'm Tavros Nitram." He said backing up a bit.

"Where're you going motherfucker?" Gamzee asked before he lunged at Tav then giving him a tight bear hug almost cracking some ribs in the process. "We're going to be so motherfuckin tight! I can just feel it."

Christian ran up to Gamzee and punched him in his bum. "That's my mommy!" He yelled attacking the older male's backside.

"Awwwww! That's so sweet! They call you mommy!" He gushed squeezing Tav tighter.

Tav gathered enough strength to pry the lunatic off him then push him away. "Don't touch me ever again." He said in a low threatening tone. "If you touch me again or lay a finger on any of these kids it will be the last thing you will ever do."

"Shit mommy! My bad! My bad!" The high teen said putting his hands up then backed away slowly standing behind Rufio for protection.

After that Tav took his leave and slammed the door behind him as he exited.

"What's wrong with mommy?" Christian asked Rufio.

"Mommy is just in one of his little funky moods, that's all." The muscular male said ruffling the kid's hair up. "He'll be alright…at least I hope so."

~a little later that night~

Tavros slammed his car door and stomped all the way up the stairs that lead to his little apartment. "I can't believe him!" He thought grinding his teeth and clenching his fists. "Who would allow a dirty no good felon to work with children!?"

The front door slammed wide open then he walked in tossing his keys on the table. "I'm home." He groaned when he spotted his lazy roommate sitting her fat ass on the sofa playing one of here video games.

"Yo." She said quickly paying her game more mind than her friend. "What's wrong wit you mommy?"

He huffed walking over to her then sitting next to her kicking his feet up on the cluttered coffee table. "You won't believe what dad did today."

"What? Wait don't tell me." She paused her game and thought for a second. "Did he make you wipe Christian's ass again?"

"No Meenah he hired a convicted felon to work at the orphanage." He rested his head on her shoulder. "Can you believe he would do some stupid shit like that?"

"A felon you say," her eyes were full with curiosity. "Tell me what does he looks like!?"

Tavros removed his head from her and stared at her for a few seconds. "Okaaaay…that's a wired question."

"Bitch just answer the fuckin question." She demanded poking the side of his head about three times until he gave in.

"Fine! He's really tall and has a mess of black curls on his head." He said slapping her hand away. "And he seems a little slow if you ask me."

"Cool I guess…I'll stop by later and see him for myself." She reached out to grab a big brown package from the floor. "Any who this came for you today." She dropped the package down on his lap.

"It took it long enough to get here, I ordered this thing a few…" Tav cut his sentence short when he noticed that the package was already opened. He whipped his head around to stare at Miss Meenah who was twiddling her thumbs and whistling a joyous tune looking away from him. "Did you open this girl?" He asked narrowing his eyes.

"Who wants to know?" She asked innocently. But after she caught a glimpse of his death glare she decided to come clean. She reached behind the sofa and pulled out a giant red dildo. "Yeah I opened it," she said with a dirty grin then she flipped a little switch on the bottom of the false phallus which made it vibrate viciously in her hand. "Damn Tav I highly doubt you'll be able to take all this," she stuck her tongue out and began to slowly lick up the dildo all the way to the curved tip, leaving a thick trail of glistening saliva behind. "But I know you like the feeling of being broken in two."

A small blush appeared on Tav's tan face as he snatched his new toy from her. "How many times do I have to tell you to stop going through my shit!"

"How about I go get my harness and I fuck you with that huge thing right now?" She said getting up from the sofa and stretching a bit. "You can pretend that I'm that felon."

"Fuck no!" Tav yelled throwing an empty beer can at her head hitting her directly. "I'm going to bed!" He said storming off into his room slamming then locking the door.

"Fine then." She rubbed her injured forehead and plopped back down on the couch. "I'll get ya later mommy."


	3. Chapter 3

Heaven Haven

Time for work

~three days later~

"Would you please go somewhere else?" Tavros pleaded as he placed the kid's dinner roast in the oven. "It's really hard for me to work with you watching my every fuckin move."

Gamzee smiled from on top of the dinner table and rolled over on his stomach. "I don't get it man, how come every motherfuckin time I try to talk to you or get near you, you always act all stankadank."

"That's easy!" Tav said happily walking over to the high guy then cupping his cheeks. "The reason that I act this way is because I can't fuckin stand you." He shook his face from side to side a few times an annoyed frown formed on his face as he did so. "Do you understand?" Tav whispered releasing Gamzee's face.

"C'mon mommy! I just want to get to know ya!" He pouted sitting up. "Let's just cook up a nice conversation or some shit." He let his long legs dangle down off the table and began to swing them back and forth waiting for Tavros to respond.

"Alright," the tired adult sighed taking a chair and sitting down facing the overly excited druggie. "Let's get to know each other a little better." He leaned back in the wooden chair observing his guest from head to toe. "But don't take too long with this shit cause I still got stuff I gotta fuckin get done before I go to work."

"So what are you Mexican?" Gamzee's asked his first and to him his most important question at the time. "You look like some kind of Spanish."

Yet another deep sigh escaped Tav's mouth. "Not entirely. My dad is originally from Mexico and my mom was white. So I'm a half and half."

"No way man! My momma is black and my old man is white!" He exclaimed clapping his hands. "You know we biracials are gonna rule the motherfuckin world one day."

"Yeah…if you say so." Tav said rolling his eyes.

Gamzee chuckled for a bit seeing his so called friend's negative reaction. "I used to get picked on in high school a lot because of it, they used to call me names like zebra or Oreo cookie." He gave a few more rounds of giggles.

"It is pretty tough being mixed," Tav said recollecting all the times he was made fun of in school. "So how old are you kid?" He wanted to change the subject before it opened up any closed wounds.

Gamzee perked up a bit, shocked to hear his boss say something nice besides his usual insults or swears. "I'm twenty two. How old is you mommy?"

"I going will be turning twenty four next week." Tavros answered. "Fuck I'm getting old as shit."

Gamzee went wide eyed. "Damn I thought you were like fifteen or something! How come your so motherfuckin short n shit?"

_It's your body, you can yell if you want to, loud if you want to, scream if you want to._Suddenly Tav's cellphone began to ring with his favorite song as the ring tone going off. "Shit," Tav reached into his pocket and retrieved his phone. "Sorry I gotta take this."

"No problem," Gamzee said hopping of the table then heading out the room. "I'ma go help your dad clean the kids up for dinner."

He didn't need to look at the caller ID because Tav knew it was his manager about to chew him out for being late again. He hit the answer button and gave a very snappy "hello?"

"What a fuck Tavros!" To his surprise it wasn't his boss lady it was just Meenah again. "You're thirty minutes late! And we really need your fat ass over here right and fuckin now!"

"Calm down girl I'm on my way." And with that Tav hung up. "Damn I hate being late," he said to himself hustling out of the kitchen to go tell his father he had to leave. "Fuck me."

"Oh yeah you can leave." Rufio said washing Ben's face with a washcloth after his son told him what was going down. "Just make sure you are back before lights out to clean up the place."

"Cool, I'll be back in a few hours." Tavros said grabbing his black leather jacket from off the sofa. He bent down to give Jenny a quick kiss on her cheek. "Now be a big girl and listen to daddy ok?"

The little girl nodded in agreement as she latched onto Tav's leg. "I love you mommy!"

"Wait a second!" Gamzee yelled running over to Tavros making him cringe.

"What do you want Mulatto?" Tavros snapped.

"Can you drop me by my work job on your way out?" Gamzee asked with hope filled half lidded eyes. "I'm kinda late too for my first day back."

Tavros gave a low grunt and clenched his fists. "Fuck no I'm not gonna do all that for you! I'm already a fuckin hour late!"

"Tavros!" Rufio's voice was booming and stern grabbing the attention of everyone in the room. "That is not the way we treat our new friends!"

"But dad you know how I am!" Tavros argued back with full force trying to make his father back down like he normally did.

"I don't want to hear it now take him to his job Tavros."

"So basically your just sayin fuck you son I'm going to force you to do something that makes you feel real uncomfortable!"

"Please just go I really don't have the energy to argue with you right now."

Tav, who was feeling rather steamed, turned his attention to Gamzee who was hiding behind Christian. "How come you can't take your damn self!?"

"Ummm… the honkey cracker pigs all up n took my license a while ago." He squeaked trembling in fear. "I haven't driven in four months."

Tavros managed to calm down after he saw Gamzee's cowardly reaction to him. "Fuck it I'll take ya." He said walking to the front door. "Hurry up."

"I don't know if I want to any more…" Gamzee thought following behind, but keeping a nice and safe distance away from Tav.

~a little later~

"It's up here on the left." Gamzee pointed out as the two rode down town. "Thanks again for letting me ride with you mommy."

"Yeah sure whatever," Tav said stopping at a red light. "So…what is it that you do boy?"

Gamzee smiled as he played with the small Peter Pan figure that hung down from the rearview mirror. "I'm a co-host on the hideout show. Turn it to slim 42 when I hop out so you can hear me." He looked over and smiled, "I might even give ya a little shout out."

"Yeah I don't really listen to talk shows on the radio," Tavros said turning up into the crowded parking lot. "But I might tune in."

"Cool tits," Gamzee said hopping out when the small car stopped by the entrance. "Later."

"See ya," Tavros quickly waved bye before speeding off.

~Inside the radio station we find two other hosts having a very important conversation while they waited for Gamzee to arrive. ~

"I'm telling you man Coke is so much better than that nasty ass knock off Pepsi shit." One of the two said adjusting his glasses.

"Like hell it is!" The rather short and short tempered host yelled looking for something to throw at his ignorant friend. "Everyone that's not retarded knows that Pepsi is the shit and will always be the shit!"

"No everyone that drinks that black flat shit is a full on retarded," the glasses wearing host said with a smirk, "and that includes you my slow friend. Here let me go find you a helmet."

"Fuck you, you Chinese motherfucker!" The short host screamed throwing some cds at his friends face but missing terribly.

"For the last fucking time I'm Laotian not fucking Chinese! Do I look to you like a Chinese!?"

"Yes. Yes you do."

"Yo! Yo! Yo! I'm here motherfuckers!" Gamzee shouted walking into the room with a bottle of peach faygo in his hand. "It feels so go to be back!" He said plopping down in his chair then leaning in closer to the microphone. "Guess whose back motherfuckers!"

"Well, well look what the diseased cat threw up all over the carpet." The cool Asian cat said leaning back in his chair. "It's been what three months now since you've been on the air."

"Not this asshole again." The shorty mumbled putting his headphones back on. "Now let's get this shit started so I can go home."

"KK the show started an hour ago," his friend spoke up.

"Shit man why didn't you tell me!? We can go ahead and ask the listeners what drink is better and settle this stupid dispute once and for all!"

"Good idea!" The Asian exclaimed grabbing his microphone then bringing it closer to his face. But not today it's time for dumbass discussions.

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Guys it's the hideout show with ya boy G-Mak, Two Toned Sol, and Vile Vantas!" Gamzee yelled directly into his microphone. "It's been a while I know but I'm back and ready to do this shit!"

**Just for shits and giggles I decided to try something out. I want someone to ask the most stupid dumbass random questions or topics you can think of (about anything) and I'll have the radio hosts answer or discus them briefly in the next chapter during their show. Just PM me and I'll do it happily. :3**


	4. Chapter 4

Heaven Haven

Big bad boss

Tavros continued to speed down the road ignoring the many speed limits and traffic lights. He just wanted to get out of the car, the painful memories of what happened to him that awful night began to surface. He hoped he would never have to let another guy ride with him ever again after what had happened. He could still hear his own pitiful cries and screams coming from the back seat for him to stop but the bastard wouldn't listen.

"_Nhhng…please! St-stop…take it…it… ahhh… out! It hurts! It hurts!" _

"_You're fine babe, you're just over reacting. It's going to feel real good in a second." _

He clenched the steering wheel tightly and sniffled trying to keep his rarely shed tears at bay. "Shit, I'm cracking up." He said to himself digging his nails deeper into the fabric of the wheel. "C'mon Nitram you're stronger than this!" He lied to himself. "I won't cry, I can't give that son of a bitch the satisfaction."

Soon he made it to the movie theater's almost empty parking lot. After he haphazardly parked near the front he rushed in through the double doors intentionally ignoring the ticket booth girl's friendly "hello."

"I'm here," he announced walking in the lobby. "Sorry I'm late I just had some stuff to do around the orphanage."

"Hi Tav!" The small lime green jacket wearing girl behind the concession counter yelled waving at him. "Boy you sure are late!"

"Yes this is the third time this week that you have been late," the tall and very muscular Native American man said calmly pouring himself a fountain drink. "You keep that up and you'll get fired you know."

"No one is talking to you Equius," Tavros snapped walking up to the counter, "give me some popcorn and a bag of M&M's please Nepeta."

"Sure thing!" The energetic girl said turning around to scoop up some popcorn.

"I hope you are going to pay for all of this this time," Equius said handing Tav a bag of his chocolate candy.

"Ah no," Tavros said snatching the bag away then grabbing his poppin corn. "I'm going upstairs now." He said tearing the candy bag open then pouring all of the M&M's into the bag of popcorn then shaking it up. "Mmm…I really needed this."

"Taaaaaavroooos…come in my office real quick." His boss lady called standing outside of her room.

"Looks like someone's in trouble," Meenah snickered as she swept up.

"Shit," Tavros mumbled approaching his grinning boss.

~Meanwhile back at the radio station~

"Ok biguncle34 wants to know where baby's come from," Two Toned Sol said reading off the question from his computer.

"I got this one guys," Gamzee said being all chill like. "So if you put your paternal cool whip into the toilet of a bitches maternal stank stream then stir it around with your Betty Crocker fuck muscle she can close the lid then in three days a motherfuckin baby will crawl out!"

"Thank you G-Mak for that very detailed and beautiful accurate description of how a baby is made," Vile Vantas said sarcastically.

"Now bigmeat16 wants to know what you got locked up for Gamzee." Sollux read off again. "Guess we forgot to tell them why you got thrown in jail."

"He raped a nun!" Vile Vantas yelled throwing his empty bottle of Pepsi at Gamzee but missed.

"Well motherfucker…it was my third strike. I had already got caught breaking into this fucker's house then I stole a few cars and then I got pulled over one night and I was pretty fucked up so they just locked me up for a few months." Gamzee explained.

"Ok that wraps it up for that," Sollux said tired of the stupid questions.

"Later, see ya'll tomorrow," Gamzee yelled into his microphone.

"I'm so fucking tired," Karkat sighed taking his huge headphones off, now take me home Jackie Chan!"

"Fine c'mon let's go," Sollux said getting up from his chair then fishing his keys out of his pocket.

"Shit I can't wait to lay down," Gamzee said following his two friends out. "Been a long day ya know."

~a bit later~

Sollux drove up into the small driveway of the three's own little townhouse. "Wake yo little ass up," the Asian said slapping Karkat upside his head.

"Son of a fucking whore you don't have any right to wake me up like that!" Karkat screamed as he was slapped awake.

"Hey neighbor!" Gamzee said stepping out of the car waving at the thick glasses wearing hipster who was dragging his trash bin to the curb. "How's it hangin?"

"Oh hey Gam, didn't expect you guys to come home so early." He said placing the bin down. "I havve to admit that evver since you left it's been a lot quieter."

"I don't give a fuck!" Gamzee laughed interrupting his friend.

"Howw rude!" The white guy said angrily.

"Nah I'm just messin with ya Eridan," Gamzee said patting him on his back almost making his glasses fall off his pale freckled face.

"Hurry up fuck nut and get in the house!" Karkat yelled from the porch as Sollux was walking inside the dark house.

"Catch ya later bro," Gamzee said bye to Eridan before running off into the house.

"Man and I was enjoying the peace and quiet too," Eridan whined walking back to his house.

~back with Tav~

"So how did it go?" Meenah asked waltzing inside the projector room seeing Tavros sniping and taping the films. "Was she as pissed as she was last time?"

"No she wasn't," Tav said putting one of the reels up on the shelf. "It's a good thing too, I thought I was gonna have to eat her pussy again so I could keep my job."

"Oh yeah! That was pretty hot to watch," Meenah said walking in front of the fan. "Things got all heated up pretty quick!"

"Please don't remind me," Tavros said putting his hand in his popcorn bag and grabbing a hand full of the sweet and salty snack. "She kept tugging my hair and calling me her little brown bitch. Talk about degrading."

"Vriska's the bitch not you man that's for sure," she laughed stealing some of Tav's popcorn. "Well I'm gonna leave you alone for now."

"Awww! You mean you don't want to stay up here with me and fool around until the movie starts." Tav said hugging her tightly.

"Sorry man I still have some sweeping to do, but we sure can get down with each other when we get home." She said placing her huge what not's on his head. "Make sure you bring your new toy."


	5. Chapter 5

Heaven Haven

Good news

"So fuckin sleepy," Tavros whispered with his head laying on the kitchen table of his apartment. "Why did you have to be so rough girl? It hurts like hell to just sit down."

Meenah laughed placing her bowl of cereal on the table near his head, "you know once I start it's hard for me to stop." She said sitting down beside him.

"I wish you would slow down sometimes you know," he said closing his blood shot eyes for a moment.

"_Oh Dios!" _Tav's eyes shot right back open when he heard his own voice coming from Meenah's pocket_. "Fuck me harder bitch! Ah carajo voy a acabar tan jodidamente duro! Ahhhh~!"_

Meenah looked down at Tav and laughed while retrieving her phone. "It's my new ring tone." She said shuting her phone off. "You like it? "

Tavros looked up at her his eyes looking like fiery infernos. "When I get my hands on you, you fuckin fat bitch I'm going to bust your ass into little pieces!" He roared hopping off his seat to go look for a belt or something to strike her with.

"Awww c'mon! Don't be like that holmes!" She whined before getting a spoonful of her Captain Crunch. "This is some good ass cereal, you want some of this cereal?"

Tavros returned seconds later with his sturdy black belt hung around his shoulders with a huge grin on his face. "Come over here bitch and get what's coming to you."

"What are you doing Tavros," she asked hopping off her chair and backing up slowly, "what are you doing?"

Just as Tavros had her trapped in a corner his phone went off. "Yes what do you want?" He answered his phone in an annoyed tone.

"Hey Tavros I need you to come over to the orphanage for maybe an hour or two while I go to the grocery store," said Rufio. "And that will be all I'll need you for today."

"Fine I'll be right over."

"Wanna come down to Heaven Haven with me for a little sec while my dad is out?" He asked Meenah who was cowering in the corner.

"If you not going to hit me than yes." She said flinching when he spoke to her.

}:( a little while later (0:

"What the fuck is going on!?" Tavros yelled seeing not only Gamzee but also two other males hanging out in the orphanages living room.

"Easy there Tav," Meenah said calmly rubbing his back, "don't go all crazy on me and attack these fools up in here."

"Hey Tav!" Gamzee waved at his pissed off buddy while playing with Sunna's hair on the floor. "We've been waitin all day for yo brown ass!"

Tavros glared poisoned tipped daggers at the clown then focused his attention on Karkat. He was sitting in one of the kid's tiny blue plastic chairs with the kids doing his hair with their fake kitchen utensils.

"Hehe! You look like you just got electrocuted Mr. Karat!" Callie laughed as she pulled her fork through Karkat's thick black hair.

"Owwww! That fucking hurts," he hissed as the kids combed his nappy slappy hair.

"Not so rough Callie," Rufio snickered.

"Look Karat!" Ben yelled showing him one of his toy dinosaurs. "ROAR!" He screamed shoving the toy in Karkat's face.

"Get away from me freckle face," Karkat said grabbing the dinosaur then throwing it across the room.

Ben laughed then went after the toy.

"What's that?" Christian asked pointing to a tiny lamp on the table.

"It's a lamp dude," Sollux replied. "Why do you keep asking me what things are!?"

"What's that?" The bad kid asked again grabbing a piece of toy toast.

"It's just toast! You should know what toast is!" Sollux yelled in anger.

Christian looked up him and smiled. "Toss?" He said cocking his head to the side.

"What the fuck is going on!?" Tavros demanded for the second time with a bit more volume.

"Turn it down a notch Tav," Rufio whispered covering his son's mouth with his hand. "You're alright."

"Dad would you please so kind as to fill me in to what is going on in here." Tavros said in a false calm tone.

"Well…I was wondering if you would like to go to the zoo with these three guys and the kids while I go out. You know, have a little fun."

"I think I'd rather have a heated pear of anguish shoved up my ass."

"I think you would enjoy that to some extent," Meenah whispered while nudging Tav's arm and winking at him.

"Alright how about this," Rufio said taking his wallet from his back pocket, he knew for a fact that his bull headed son wouldn't budge unless he was offered some money, "I'll give you fifty dollars if you go. All you have to do is walk around and let the kids see the animals for a bit then come home."

Tavros crossed his arms and looked up at his father then frowned, "make it a hundred and I'll do it."

"Yay! You hear that kids!?" Gamzee yelled putting Sunna on his shoulders then standing up. "We're goin on a field trip today!"

**Stay tuned for some crazy good and uncomfortable times! **


	6. Chapter 6

Heaven Haven

Long story short

"It's hotter than a mug out here," Tavros panted plopping his sweaty and tired self-down on a nearby bench vigorously waving the little zoo directory pamphlet near his face. "I don't know about you guys but I'm ready to go."

"Get your ass up and stop all that complaining!" Meenah said harshly grabbing Tav's arm then pulling him off the bench. "We just got here like thirty minutes ago! So suck it up and shut up."

Tavros stumbled to his feet after she let go of him then glared at her before simply saying, "Don't tell me to shut up girl! It's so fuckin hot out here, fuckin bad ass kids everywhere, my feet hurt and Christian keeps trying to escape!" He ended his speech by pointing at the curly heady boy who was trying to give Sollux the slip again.

"Getting real tired of you kid," Sollux said firmly grabbing the child by his collar and dragging him along. "They need to put you on some medicine or something."

"Its ok man," Gamzee said patting Tavros gently on his back a few times. "Just as soon as we see everything we can all up an split." He looked down at the petite adult and smiled.

Gamzee's nice words only succeeded in making Tavros even more pissed. Tav grunted as he turned around, he cocked his hand back ready to slap some sense into the goofy clown. "How many times do I have to tell you not touch me!? Huh!?"

Meenah seized his arm and held him back just as he was about to strike, "c'mon man hitting him won't do anything for ya. So why don't you calm down and go take Callie and Jenny over to the new butterfly garden alright?" She continued to say letting him go.

Without looking at her or saying a word he took both of the little girl's hands and headed down the path that lead to the butterflies.

"Man he's getting worse," Meenah said watching her good old friend walk off.

"That was close," Karkat laughed getting a glance of Gamzee's surprised face, "he almost slapped the shit out of you! Hahaha! Would have served you right to!"

"Damn, it would have been hilarious to see you get hit by that guy man," Sollux said before he started to laugh along with Karkat.

"What did I do wrong?" Gamzee asked taking Sunna off of his shoulders. "Fill a motherfucka in please."

It was none of his business but Meenah decided to tell him what was going down anyway. "Let's just say he kinda just got out of a really fucked up abusive relationship with this dude and now he scared shitless of other guys," Meenah said with some concern. "So next time when he says don't touch me, don't touch him. It really freaks him out. Well just being around other guys freaks him out."

"Fuck I had no idea," Gamzee said rubbing Sunna's head as she clung to his long legs. "Is there anything I can do to help him out?"

"Nah, he's too far gone to change back into his old shy self now," Meenah said as she continued to walk away from the group. "Just be nice to him and maybe, maybe he'll warm up to you, maybe."

A big happy smile appeared on Gamzee's face, "ok! Then I'll just start being all nice to the little motherfucker!"

"Whatever you say man, now let's go look at that giant aquarium over there," she said taking Christian's hand and walking off.

"I'ma go over there and look at the petting zoo with Sunna," Gamzee said picking her up then placing her back on his shoulders. "Catch yall later yo!"

Karkat and Sollux stared at each other for a moment. "Want to go look at that new baby stingray?" Sollux asked.

"I guess," Karkat answered following his buddy to the stingray habitat.

"Whas thaaaaat?" Sunna asked pulling on Gamzee's thick curly locks.

"That's my hair little momma," Gamzee laughed as he entered into the petting zoo. "Now let's put you down and touch up on some motherfuckin animals."

He set her down and watched her run off to grab some cute baby chicks. "Awww, that's so cute," he said reaching in his pocket then bringing one of his blunts out. "Now let's see when I left my motherfuckin lighter at." He said checking the rest of his pockets.

"Whas thaaaat?" Sunna asked again holding a tiny yellow chick in her hands and showing it to Gamzee.

"It's a hotdog," Gamzee whispered as he took a deep inhale of his freshly lit fatty.

Sunna kept asking him what the chick was and every time Gamzee said it was a hotdog she just laughed up a storm.

Sunna abruptly stopped her laughing fit when she spotted her mommy entering into the petting zoo. "We momma," she said dropping the poor chick then running over to Tavros.

"Where'd ya go little momma?" Gamzee asked when he finally noticed the she had disappeared. "Oh shit mommy's going to kill me if I don't find that girl!" Gamzee then turned slowly around and heaved a sigh of relief when he saw the little girl in Tav's arms. "When did he get here?" Gamzee though taking another hit.

But then something hard kept hitting the back of his legs almost knocking him to the ground." Quit it motherfucker," he said trying to shoo whatever it was away.

"Baaaaaaa!" He turned around and looked down at this angry as fuck goat that kept bleating at him.

"Cool tits it's a goat!" He said happily while grabbing one of its curved horns with one hand then fondling its long white beard with the other. "You guys are so cute with them creepy rectangular eyes!"

The old goat gave one last push forward and knocked the high guy onto his ass. "Owwww man that wasn't very nice ya dig!"

The goat then walked up to Gamzee and picked his dropped blunt off the ground. "Don't do it," he warned, "don't you do it motherfucker."

The goat ignored him then began munching on the blunt.

"THAT WAS MY LAST BLUNT!" Gamzee yelled leaping back on his feet then chasing the goat all around the petting zoo. GET BACK HERE MOTHERFUCKER!

"What are you doing Mulatto?" Tavros asked when Gamzee ran past him. "I hope you're not planning to harm that goat."

Gamzee stopped in his tracks and looked at the pissed off Mexican. "Uh…no way bro, we were just playing a friendly game of tag!" Gamzee lied letting the goat escape his hot wrath.

After Gamzee cooled down some he noticed that Tavros was surrounded by many of the animals. "Looks like you got quite the way with animals. That's pretty cool." Gamzee said walking up to him petting some animals along the way.

"Yeah, I really love animals," Tav said gently rubbing the nose of a bull calf that was all up in his face. "I think they like me too."

Gamzee laughed when he saw a tiny chick nesting on top of Tav's thick brown hair. The little girls giggled when they saw it too.

"What's so funny? Is there something on my head?" Tav asked pretending like he didn't know there was a bird in his hair.

But before Gamzee could open his mouth to say something his two home boys ran into the pen towards him.

"Hey man we gotta bounce like right now!" Sollux said out of breath as he held onto Gamzee's shirt. "It's really important that we do!"

"Why dude?" Gamzee asked, "Give me the 411 on the 911!"

"Don't tell me you already forgot fuckface!" Karkat yelled pushing Sollux out of his way. "That cocky douche bag Dave is throwing a party next door tonight so we gotta throw an even bigger and better one so we can rub it in his fugly face!"

"I second that! I'm tired of hearing him talk about how awesome his Friday night parties are all the time, without having the decency of inviting us!" Sollux yelled.

"What's this about a party?" Meenah asked joining the conversation hauling a knocked out Christian over her back. "Let me come yo."

"Ok! Having a chick would be a good start," Sollux said pulling his phone out. "Now I'm going to invite some more people! That dickhole won't know what hit him."

"I'll call some of my girls," Meenah said taking her phone it. "This mess better be fun too."

"Alright guys let's get out of his stanky shithole," Karkat said exiting the petting zoo with Sollux.

"Wanna partake in the party mommy?" Gamzee asked taking the chick off Tav's head then putting it in his own messy hair. "It's gonna be soooo much motherfuckin fun!"

Tavros shrugged, "I guess. I got nothing better to do tonight anyway."

**Stay tuned for a fun party then some drunk sex yo. **


	7. Chapter 7

Heaven Haven

I need an adult!

"This party is the suckiest party I have ever been too," Tavros said before bringing his plastic red cup up to his plump lips and taking a huge gulp of the highly alcoholic beverage. "Shit that's strong," he hissed wiping his mouth of any drops of the drink that missed his mouth.

"I think it's cool," Meenah said sliding over to the stubborn wall flower and grabbing his big hips, "care to dance mi lady?" She asked in an awful British accent. They had been there for twenty minutes and she was already lit, which pissed off Tav a little bit, he was normally the one of the first ones to get lit and make a total jackass of himself.

"No thanks," he said pushing her away, "I'm just gonna stay here and watch." He brought the cup back up to his mouth but once he noticed it was empty he sucked his teeth in anger. "Great now I gotta go hunt down another fuckin drink."

"Calm down man!" Meenah yelled louder than was necessary, "why you being such a negative Nancy?" She asked blocking his way, "be a positive Pete or something! C'mon now!"

Tavros pushed her to the side and continued to walk pass the massive clog of people just to get to the kitchen trying his hardest not to bump into anyone along the way.

"This party is so crunk!" Karkat said happily walking over to Sollux who was trying to fix the old stereo system in the crowed living room. "Hey! You listening to me ching chong?"

"I'd be even better once this piece of shit starts up," Sollux said pushing buttons and turning dials on the devise. "We really need to think about upgrading."

"Well hurry up and get it running man before people start to leave to go over next door to that dickhole Dave's party," Karkat said taking a sip of his drink, "he's got some music playing over there."

Sollux pushed once last button and the whole stereo came to life with booming music flowing through the entire house. "Oh yeah! Now it's a party!" The Asian said turning it up even louder. "Where the white women at?"

Then the place really started jumping with everyone dancing and shit spilling shit and knocking shit over. All that loud noise that suddenly sprang up startled the shit out of Tavros. "Why does it have to be so loud!?" He said entering the barley populated kitchen. "Finally I can get a drink and sit down."

"Yo," Tav growled when he heard Gamzee voice approaching him, "here ya go," he handed Tav a fresh new drink and smiled down at him. "Now that shit is like the strongest shit that I have ever tasted."

Tavros glared at him but reluctantly took the drink. He looked down inside the cup to see it contents. "What is this?" He asked seeing as how the beverage was a bright green color.

"Its absinth, ya know the green fairy," Gamzee answered his question with an evil grin. "Don't drink it all at one time though cause it'll cause ya to hallucinate something fierce."

"Thanks for the heads up," Tavros said before taking a few sips of his drink. "Holy fuckin shit that's amazing!" He could definitely taste all the sugar and wormwood that was mixed in. The drink had so much alcohol in it Tav was already a little lit after a few sips. "I like this drink!" He squealed in delight.

Gamzee sat down at the kitchen table and laughed up a storm, "you're really funny man. If you come over here and talk to me I'll pour ya some more," he said presenting Tav the half empty bottle. "If ya don't then I guess I'm gonna have to drink it all, all by my lonesome."

Tavros grunted, he didn't want to, well he really didn't want to but he decided that the heavenly drink was just too good to give up so he pulled up a chair and sat opposite of the smiling druggie. "Gimmie some more," he said holding out his cup.

"Whatever ya say boss!" Gamzee said pouring a little bit more in his cup.

!(Twenty minutes later)!

"Oh yeah! Hahahah! I'm so drunk!" Tav was totally out of his mind. All that green fairy was making him see strange things everywhere. "Are ya gonna be celibate with me baby?" He asked stroking Gamzee's cheek lightly. Gamzee just was carrying him bridal style up the stairs to his room. He didn't want his new friend to get into any trouble because of his current intoxicated state, so he thought it would be for the best to lock him away in his room until he sobered up a bit.

"Uhhh…I don't know if I can do all that bro." Gamzee said feeling a little freaked out by Tav's crazy behavior but it was really amusing.

Tavros laughed, "Damn all these colors and little people walking around…why…why are they doing that? That potato just sprouted legs and went into your mouth." Tavros whispered putting his index finger into Gamzee's mouth. "You are so ready."

"Ok…you sir drunk waaaay too much absinth." The tall cat said kicking his bedroom door open. "Yo you're gonna stay here until ya calm down." He placed the chuckling and drooling adult down on the bed on his stomach. "I'm going back down stairs," he turned out and headed out, "I'll be back to check up on ya."

But Tav reached out and seized his hand. "Where do you think you're going you fat bitch?" He asked looking up at him with half lidded foggy eyes. "I think I'm in the mood for that big ass of yours."

"Wait…what!?" Gamzee was utterly shocked to see his normally stern and uptight boss look and sound so slutty. "Sorry bro but I'm not that kind of guy!" He panicked swinging his arm around until it was free of Tav's tight grip.

Tavros sat up and glared up at him. "Shut up and get on the bed," he ordered while taking his shirt off then tossing it off to the side. "I was your bitch last night," he got up from the bed and waked up to the sweeting druggie, "now it's your turn to be mine." And with a flick of the wrist Gamzee was down on the bed, scared to death, he didn't know what kind of sick and twisted games Tav was going to put him through. "Now close your eyes and wait for me."

"Hey! Don't I have a say in this!?" Gamzee asked closing his eyes. "I don't like any of this." He sobbed.

"Stop your bitching Meenah," Tavros said sharply while pulling his shorts down. "Before I give ya something to really whine about."

Gamzee waited patiently for his boss to do something to him, his mouth wasn't moving but his mind sure was racing. "How do I get out of this mess!? I don't want another dude to work me over! How am I going to explain this to Jesus!?" Just as he was getting his escape plan together he felt a pair of big soft and hot globes on his face. His eyes shot open and hollered, "what the motherfuck!?" Tav's nice ass was resting happily on his face.

Tavros grinned, "Hurry up and get your ass up in me." He said while stroking Gamzee's hardening cock through his baggy pants. "Well…I'm waiting."

Gamzee stared up at Tav's perfectly molded chocolate ass and blushed, "shit man, I don't want to do this." He let a little moan escape his mouth as Tav's hand moved faster.

"Huh? What was that baby?" Tavros asked sweetly as he began to slowly jack him off. "If I'm gonna take all of this big fat cock here I'm gonna need you to get me all wet and ready." He removed his hand from Gamzee's now fully hard cock then licked most of the salty precum that was smeared on his fingers. "Now let's get this party started."

**Stay tuned for some more nastiness! **


End file.
